The Election Commission (EC) is like any other government agency in town.  The hakim sahebs there know how to waste taxpayers’ money by purchasing luxury vehicles for themselves. The EC spent millions of Rupees on voter education and most of us were still confused when we went to the polls. And like most of our sarkari offices, we all know that lots of inflated bills are approved and chiya kharcha is shared among the folks there.

Let’s hope one day, we will really get used to electronic voting machines so that our politicians won’t have to chew the ballot papers to win elections. And we also won’t have to waste millions more to feed our civil servants and members of the political parties when they spend days and weeks counting votes. We can get the results within hours and all of us can go back to the work the next day instead of wasting our time at local chiya pasals talking politics for weeks or even months.

It seems that politics is like a sport in this country. We see politics everywhere and we need factions as well. It’s not only national politics but even the local tole sudhar samiti will have factions and both parties will battle it out as if they will get the chance to loot billions of Rupees from the State Treasury like our political parties. Even our local youth clubs will turn into war zones when it’s time for elections to elect a new Executive Committee. Yes, whenever there is money to be made from parking or renting out government land to vegetable sellers or any freebies from the State, then we will have folks battling it out to lead our toles, youth clubs and any social, sports and even recreational organisations.

It seems that our laws of the land are only for common folks while our civil servants, politicians and political parties can get away with anything. Our EC has decided to give official status to the greatest communist party on Earth. Yes, our Nepal Communist Party (NCP) is now registered with EC even as it fails to ensure 33 percent seats to women. Our EC folks think it’s okay to allow the registration of NCP even if it does not meet the requirements set by the EC.

The NCP has only 16 percent women in its central committee whereas it has only two women in its standing committee and no women in its nine-member central secretariat. The greatest Communist party on Earth has only 72 women in its 441-member central committee. Our communist netas are poor men married to rich women but it seems that when it comes to politics, they do not want to give women opportunities to lead the party.

But it seems that Oli Baba did not even think it would be a good move to give opportunity to a woman to lead Province 3 as its Chief Minister. Instead another grumpy old man was given the chance to be the Chief Mumbler. After all, our Chief Ministers now know that they will not be given adequate budget nor authority to make their provinces prosperous. The so-called sharing is caring natak is only true when our political parties share the loot at the federal level but our central government is not interested to share revenue, authority and a whole lot of stuff with the provincial and local bodies at all.

We may have a woman President but we will know that we have at least made it when we will have a woman Prime Minister in Singha Durbar in real life instead of only in a TV series. Yes, we wouldn’t mind Gauri Malla as our real Prime Minister someday.  India had Indira Gandhi, Pakistan had Benazir, Sri Lanka and Bangladesh have had their shares of iron ladies. When will we get ours?  The British had one before and they now have another but the Amrikis missed out the chance to have a woman leader at the White House. When will we get our Superwoman?

Our PM Oli has asked women politicians of his own party not to make it a big issue because the 33 percent quota will be fulfilled when the party has its general convention in the next two years. What our women politicians from all political parties need to understand is that these old men will not give women and minorities any chance to lead the parties.

Our women politicians should quit their parties and establish a new all-women political party instead. Yes, let us show the world that we can do it. Our sisters, mothers, girlfriends and wives should all get together and register a new political party. Then our EC wallahs might come up with a new rule that seeks 33 percent representation of men.

We have seen what our men netas have done to this country. Yes, we have seen a few corrupt women netas as well but it’s about time our women politicians got together and stand up for elections the next time around and finally lead us to peace and prosperity instead of dividing this country into pieces so that most of our netas and their near ones can get free lunch from the State. Mothers know best but why are we still giving our clowns the chance to pass the test when they have failed miserably over and over again. Yes, we should try again till we succeed but not in politics. Aren’t we tired of our blood sucking parasites?  If yes, then ask your sisters, wives, girlfriends and mothers to work together to take us all out from the political cesspool.  Women of Nepal unite to form the greatest political party on Earth!

Guffadi is a grumpy old man who blogs at guffadi.blogspot.com. You may contact him at [email protected]