Impermanence in the moonlightWhy do you think people watch their loved ones sleep? I have my own reasons.
Why do you think people watch their loved ones sleep? I have my own reasons.
When I woke up in the middle of a night, there she was right beside me, sleeping peacefully. The beaming light of the silver moon from the heavens came in through the window, and fell upon her, from head to toe. Time stood still as I inspected every inch of her face. Her eyelids slightly creased, the moles formed an equilateral triangle above her left eye. As she inhaled and exhaled softly, her body generated a rhythm of its own. Strands of her ebony black hair swayed along as the cool breeze caressed her gently like a painter’s stroke. She had eyes made of opal, a body of a nymphet, heart of a little girl, and the wit of a fool. She looked utterly innocent and vulnerable in her sleep.
Never had I ever observed her so well, for so long, and without any explanation. There was something immensely peaceful and warm about watching her sleep. I reached for her face, planted a gentle kiss on her temple and watched her subconscious respond. That is when her REM kicked in. I hoped that she was dreaming of lush meadows, sparkling mountains, and of settled lakes that shimmered under the rays of the mellow sun.
When I ran my finger under her dainty nose, I could feel the warm air she so quietly exhaled-enough to send ripples through my heart. Time stood still, almost as if everything about her serene slumber hypnotised me. She was probably her truest self at that moment—fearless, unaffected and at the depth of her oblivion. Innately attractive, every inch of her had me engrossed. Nothing about her seemed flawed.
I climbed off the bed and walked up to the window. I smiled at the moon drifting in that calm summer starlit sky, and it smiled right back at me. When I looked back at my love, her hair was a beautiful mess. I felt like I could listen to her all night long.
With every passing moment I felt ever more captivated. I went back to her and held her hands in mine. As her pulses synched with my heartbeats, I closed my eyes for a while and took a deep sigh. Then a sad realisation hit me. The beautiful love of my life, that was right in front of me at the moment, wouldn’t live forever. Neither would I. Like everything else in this world, we’d eventually disappear into the dark.
I felt a heavy weight fall on my heart replacing the initial tranquility. A lump formed in my throat.
I thought to myself: But love is an endless ocean. It has neither a beginning, nor an ending. It transcends the boundaries of life and death. Even after death, our love would remain to paint memories as it danced in the wind.
Would she ever know the compassion that I felt for her from the deepest bottom of my heart?
I opened my eyes to look at her again. She looked as fragile as a snowflake falling from the sky, like a dew drop on a leaf at dawn, like buds in early spring, and like a water bubble floating in the void. So fragile that a single touch could wipe her out, tear her down. It broke me apart.
She slept like a child all night long, completely oblivious to any of my words or actions. All I wished to do was seize the night and accompany her in her peaceful slumber while I still could.
But unable to, I walked over to my desk and wrote:
From both your eyes, from your nostrils
From both your ears and from your chin
Forth from your heart and mind
And from your tongue
I’ll drive your malady away
From what is voided within,
From strands of your hair
And from tip of your nails,
From all yourself top to toe
I’ll drive your malady away
Ill thoughts and nightmares
Will no longer visit you
Even in the darkest of nights
Sleep with the silver moon
Rise with the burning sun
Now spread your wings
And fly with the birds
Under the bluest of the skies
Croon in the early mornings
And take a man’s blues away
Flow with the rivers
And gather the streams
Down from the hills and mountains
Let flowery grass spring up
Let there be lakes with lotus blooms
Drift with the clouds
And the blowing wind
Without a destination
To the faraway deserts
And fill up the oasis